Whatever you're selling, I don't want it

I don't know anyone who doesn't get thoroughly pissed off with the inanity of commercials on British TV (I say British, but American is even worse). So many things about them are bad that I will confine myself to the things that really get on my nose and up my wick:



Using animations rather than real people: cheap and nasty, don't buy the product.
Portraying women as strong and men as wimps: sexist, don't buy the product.
Screaming instead of speaking, awful pop music: don't buy the product.
Repetitive themes/slogans that get on your nerves: don't buy the product.
Celebrities faking sincerity (Michael Parkinson, vomit). Don't buy the product.
Phony happy families, especially at Christmastime. Don't buy the product.
Janet Street-Porter. I don't think she does ads, but I just don't like her.
Ads with cute puppies advertising toilet paper. Wipe your arse on the dog.
Sexy women who aren't sexy; also poovy men. Don't buy the product.
Ads for beauty products. They don't fucking work. Don't buy the product.
Ads for legal services. Horrible people. Don't buy the product.

In fact, if it's advertised on TV, don't buy it.